With his heavy feet on toll, the showstopper relunctantly walk to the station. Not wanting to go home so soon, he decided to travel to the end of the train route before heading back home. Miss one, miss two and board the third.
On the train the showstopper was feeling what he has always been feeling since pathetic school has started...TIRED. Finally next week is E-learning week and the showstopper can finally take some deserve break to rest his mind, body and soul. But good dreams are always short-lived. Thoughts of assignments, projects some other school crap sink the showstopper into a state of emotional downfall. He was wondering abt hw is he going to complete his assignment especially bloody crappy shitty UCCD report. It was not the teacher. Neither was it the module. It was the word "REPORT". He hated it.
To tell the truth, the showstopper wasn't in the joyous of mood since the sun has risen. It was not anger but people should know how he is feeling. Adding to the downfall of his emotional state is the continual listening of music expressing the state of sadness. Human being are strange. When they are happy, they love to hear happy song which make them happier. When they are sad, the love to hear emotional song which will make them sadder.
On the trip home, the showstopper though through many things. He feels that his friends are not as "friend" as was the case with last year. Prehaps the change of class contribute to this feeling as people make new friends in new environment. He was happy with the current bunch of people he was hanging out with but still he felt he was a little left out. Prehaps he did not have enough common topic to share with them. He wasn't sharing as much lately during the breaks. Much of the topic have already been used up in the first couple of week. Prehaps he was really too tired to come out with new topics.
Feeling left out, his addiction came back to haunt him. He loves to play "Football Manager" but he knows when to stop especially when he knows he has a lesson the next day. However lately he has been seekng solance in the game that he played till 1 plus in the morning knowing a lesson at 8am is beckoning and he has to wake up at 5 plus to get prepared. Result has been that he was extremely tired during lesson and often have to resort to getting caffine out of tea to prevent him from falling alseep during the most unappropriate time of all.
During the trip, the showstopper suddenly have the feeling that he wasn't being loved. He felt lonely. He feels that he has been walking alone. He loves to walk under the rain but lately because of this, he waited till the rain has stopped or turned into a drizzle before venturing out. He was willing to walk under a shower in the past. He thinks that walking under the rain with your loves one is romantic but has added one new philosphy into it. Walking under the rain alone makes one even lonlier.
Reaching the station leading to home, he dragged his feet out and walked himself back. He was feeling really tired. He doesn't have the mood to showstop as of late. He wasn't churning out the jokes as of late. Even if it was churn out, it was pretty lame to say the least. He wasn't able to entertain people. He like doing that. What is a showstopper when he isn't able to showstop. He needs a break, hoping that the spirit of showstopping can come back to him, making him look lovable and lifely instead of looking sad and lifeless.
During the break that the showstopper is taking, he has another agenda to try to fufill. Find some motivation to go to school. He didn't have the motivation to go to school for a long time, especially since the new school term started 5 weeks ago. So much so that he has been late for almost half of the lesson. Late as in prehaps less than 10 minutes or sometimes more than that. But what amaze him is that the number of time he was late this new school year as it account for half or more of the number of time that he was late during the previous school year. He didn't have the motivation to make sure he was early for class unless the hairdryer treatment awaits.
Hope he will that eventually he will find the motivation to go school soon. Until the motivation actually arrive, he is actually in school not for the purpose of studying and learning but to mingle around with his friends and have fun. Till that day he waits.
Showstopper Quote of the Day:
"Don't give people hope when eventually you are going to take it away in the most cruel way of all."
"Giving people hope and taking it away is even more cruel than not giving it in the first place."
I say Singapore Pools is one of the major curprit of all time. Giving people hope of striking lottery and then taking it away when the results were posted. It should have never been open for operation in the first place. At least it don't give people hope to strike lottery in the first place unless bookies comes into play.
Theory apply to other cases too not just SG pools.
Till then...bye all.
<黑暗中，星闪闪>
5/18/2007 11:06:00 PM
5/18/2007 11:06:00 PM